Whale beached in New York City (SBS)

A whale of a time,
Trying to find his big break,
Finback does it tough.

Go to article.

Eastern Europe deadly freeze leaves hundreds dead (BBC)

A cold, harsh winter,
Temps plummet far below norm,
Many cold, some dead.

Go to article.

Julian Assange: WikiLeaks to release 1 million new documents (CNN)

Big news for new year,
WikiLeaks will wiki-flood,
To hit all countries.

Go to article.

Ricky Gervais will star in The Muppets sequel (BBC)

Puppets set for laughs,
From the Office to big screen,
Gervais Muppets-up!

Go to article.

Apple Australia Map Glitch: Snakes! In The Desert! (yahoo7)

An Apple a day,
Keeps you lost in a bad way,
In desert of snakes!

Go to article.

For those who can stomach and afford it, time for a jumbo latte (SMH)

A crappuccino?
Beans cooked inside elephants,
Make for pricey poo.

Go to article.

Sydney named best city in Australia (SMH)

Travel readers vote,
For buzzing cosmo delights,
Sydney best in Oz.

Go to article.

Gangnam Style now world's most watched video (ABC)

Massive global hit,
Psy 'horse-rides' Biebs off top spot,
YouTube Gangnam Style.

Go to article.

Nine hospitalised as NSW temps hit 42C (9 News)

Hottest summer start,
Sun-fun not for everyone,
As heat wave exhausts.

Go to article.

Scottish GP runs seven marathons in five days (SBS)

GP leads the way,
To encourage exercise,
Scot runs round the world.

Go to article.

Nicki Minaj blames retailers for album flop (NME)

Flogging a dead horse,
Target blamed for Minaj flop,
Re-release just sucks.

Go to article.

At least 117 killed in fire at Bangladeshi clothing factory (CNN)

Workers jump for life,
Hundreds trapped by raging blaze,
Factory hots up.

Go to article.

Southern schoolies prepare for Gold Coast party (ABC)

Death, arrests and more,
Tragedy casts a shadow,
Party turns sombre.

Go to article.

North Korea leader lauded in giant hillside slogan (BBC)

Visible from space,
Tribute paid to 'Shining Sun',
North Korea writes.

Go to article.

Rare albino badger causes a stir in Dorset market town of Beaminster (Metro)

Mystery of fur,
Rumours have town on the hunt,
For strange pale badger.

Go to article.

The Wiggles to sell Big Red Car (SBS)

Wake up SIDS and Kids!
Everybody's ebaying,
For a Big Red Car!

Go to article.

One Direction top UK single and album charts (BBC)

The Little Things please,
One Direction to top spot,
A Boy Band double.

Go to article.

Where and when to view solar eclipse (ABC)

A nice view for few,
Total eclipse of the sun,
True Kodak moment.

Go to article.

Gomez 'couldn't trust' Bieber (music-news.com)

Bieb flirts with twitter,
Gomez leaves that scene behind,
Can't trust that Baby.

Go to article.

President Barack Obama defeats Romney to win re-election (BBC)

Two heated campaigns,
Nation split down the middle,
O's prez for four more.

Go to article.

Prebble over the moon to win for Williams (ABC)

Top horses upstaged,
A full Green Moon for Melbourne,
Prebble wins fourth cup.

Go to article.

Australia prepares for royal arrival (ABC)

Polish those tubas,
Throw some snags on the barbie,
Royals go outback.

Go to article.

Superstorm Sandy: interactive before and after images (ABC)

Devastated land,
Damage captured from above,
See Sandy destroy.

Go to article.

Flamingo on the run 'causing havoc' (SBS)

Three months on the run,
A fugitive flamingo,
Zoo keepers baffled.

Go to article.

Rod Stewart: 'I used to take cocaine anally' (NME)

Rock, drugs, and groupies,
Virgin tales of Maggie May,
Risqué Rod Reveals.

Go to article.

US braces for hurricane landfall (BBC)

US coast threatened,
President presses warnings,
Sandy's wrath beckons.

Go to article.

Autumn International Series: England thrash Wales (BBC)

Welsh take a beating,
England bags a big tally,
Eyes on the final.

Go to article.

Microsoft's last stand: Computer giant takes its 'biggest gamble' as Windows 8 software launches around the world (Daily Mail)

Windows 8 revealed,
PC perceptions 'shattered',
Critics sceptical.

Go to article.

Timberlake, Biel tie the knot (ABC)

Biel has JT's love,
Stars find their Seventh Heaven,
Wedding Justified.

Go to article.

World's oldest dad, 96, fathers second baby in two years (metro)

Still making babies,
Near one hundred and still hot,
A very grand dad.

Go to article.

Beyonce set for Super Bowl show (BBC)

Superbowl '13,
R'n'B Queen to headline,
She runs that mutha.

Go to article.

20 shot dead at Nigerian mosque (ABC)

A place of worship,
Becomes one of blood and grief,
Armed thieves kill in mosque.

Go to article.

Nobel Peace Prize awarded to European Union (BBC)

For promoting peace,
For reconciliation,
EU wins Nobel.

Go to article.

Nun caught on camera stealing beer (Metro)

Boozy nun busted,
Sister shows off bad habit,
Next stop, Confession.

Go to article.

Gillard's misogyny speech goes global (ABC)

For double standards
And sexism, Abbot slammed,
Headlines praise Gillard.

Go to article.

Elderly UK couple 'unwittingly' grew pot (SBS)

Pot-growing grannies,
Fence-height cannabis plant seized,
Old-timers smoked out.

Go to article.

Glastonbury tickets sell out in record time (BBC)

World's biggest rock gig,
Thousands grab sell out tickets,
But who will perform?

Go to article.

Jobs numbers give Obama a boost (ABC)

As joblessness falls,
Obama's job prospects rise,
Will voters agree?

Go to article.

Adele's Bond theme, Skyfall, tops iTunes chart (BBC)

Shaken but not stirred,
Anxious Adele delivers,
Skyfall tops iTunes.

Go to article.

Graham guilty of biting charge (ABC)

Bulldog gets bitten,
For pulling an 'Iron Mike',
Twelve match punishment.

Go to article.

Man jailed for attacking wife with sandwich (Metro)

Sandwiched between bars,
Post-bready attack on wife,
A man feels crumby.

Go to article.

Oregon farmer eaten by his pigs (BBC)

Farmer becomes swill,
The tables have turned it seems,
As pigs butcher man.

Go to article.

Justin Bieber pukes on stage in Arizona (NME)

Sickening Biebs gig,
Pop brat adds cool new dance move,
The 'vomit and run.'

Go to article.

In pictures: Benin's artist Gerard Quenum's spooky dolls (BBC)

These Dolls Never Die,
Play time for Benin artist,
Baby dolls as art.

Go to article.

Swans victorious over Hawthorn (ABC)

AFL final,
With savage momentum swings,
Swans are champions!

Go to article.

David Cameron promises to brush up on British history after Letterman test (Metro)

Letterman pop quiz,
British PM left flummoxed,
More homework needed.

Go to article.

Andy Williams, Moon River singer, dies aged 84 (BBC)

Singing legend dies,
But his spirit will live on,
Deep in Moon River.

Go to article.

New owner to rebuild MySpace from scratch (ABC)

Time to un-friend 'Tom',
Get set to revamp your space,
Fresh start for Myspace.

Go to article.

Hero pig dives into water to save goat from drowning (Metro)

Super Swine takes charge,
"That'll do pig, that'll do",
Goat finds its hero.

Go to article.

Crocodile breaks loose on Qantas flight (SBS)

Surprise passenger,
Crocodile rocked the cargo,
Freight firm is questioned.

Go to article.

Chris Brown album sold in HMV with 'This Man Beats Women' warning stickers (NME)

Record sticker stunt,
Brown defaced by campaigners,
'Woman beater' bruised.

Go to article.

Australian Roman Catholic Church admits child sex abuse (BBC)

A rare confession,
Over six hundred abused,
Church admits child harm.

Go to article.

Fukyu! Court bans sushi restaurant name (SBS)

A sushi name game,
'Fukyu' restaurant too rude,
Avoid the blowfish!

Go to article.

Stephen King's Shining sequel due next year (The Guardian)

Thirty-six years on,
Crazy Jack re-emerges,
"Heeeeere's Johnny...again!"

Go to article.

Prison 'torture' footage sparks protests in Georgia (ABC)

Prisoners tortured,
Horrific scenes of abuse,
Georgia takes to streets.

Go to article.

Illegal rat meat `sold to public' (BBC)

Come to East London,
Try our tasty meat products,
Caught fresh by the cat.

Go to article.

Sarah Blasko releases title track from new album 'I Awake' (music-news.com)

As day follows night,
Aussie songbird wakes again,
Fourth album coming.

Go to article.

Koala sparks Adelaide police incident (SBS)

Intruder alert!
Koala mistook for thief,
Questioned and released.

Go to article.

Neil Armstrong remembered at public memorial (BBC)

Armstrong not so strong,
One giant leap remembered,
Lunar legend gone.

Go to article.

Graffiti artist loses freedom of expression appeal (ABC)

City ads defaced,
Graf not deemed free expression,
Artist tagged a crim.

Go to article.

Ben & Jerry's sues porn company over X-rated films (Metro)

Ice cream pioneers,
Offer an icy response,
In porno lawsuit.

Go to article.

Madonna opens Hard Candy Fitness Gym in Sydney (music-news.com)

Hung up on fitness,
Four minutes to work ya ass,
Gym for hard Madge fans.

Go to article.

Runaway bull causes pandemonium at Edinburgh Zoo (Metro)

Running of the bull,
Guests hide with chimps (fitting, no?),
Scottish zoo madness!

Go to article.

Ronan Keating: 'I deserved what I got' (music-news.com)

Ronan learns lesson,
When you say nothing at all,
Wives will still find out.

Go to article.

Star is caught devouring planet (BBC)

An ageing star grows,
It grows larger and larger,
Then eats a planet!

Go to article.

Tainted pickles kill six in Japan (BBC)

Beware the pickle,
Chinese cabbage is to blame
For dead Japanese.

Go to article.

Tom Daley sports Olympic rings tattoo on Twitter after London 2012 success (Metro)

Some Olympic ink,
Britain's favourite bronzed boy
Shows off his new rings.

Go to article.

Melbourne remains world's most liveable city (ABC)

Melbourne crowned again,
Worlds most livable city,
Global survey says.

Go to article.

Spice Girls rock Olympic Closing Ceremony (music-news.com)

Olympics spiced up,
The games close with a party,
Music legends star.

Go to article.

Hooker title defence falls short (ABC)

Confidence issues,
Hooker has no luck with pole,
No gold earned today.

Go to article.

Trapped squirrel police rescue ends in tragedy (Metro)

The squirrel is trapped.
The squirrel is free at last.
The squirrel is dead.

Go to article.

Beyonce And Jay-Z Are The Highest-Paid Celebrity Couple In The World (MTV)

Couples, watch the throne,
Jay Z and Bey top earners,
They run this mutha.

Go to article.

Patty the donkey likes to paint pictures one brushstroke at a time (metro)

Patty loves to paint,
She strokes her brush all day long,
She also eats grass.

Go to article.

Australian spider named after Sir David Attenborough (BBC)

Eight legs. Eighty years.
Octogenarian Dave,
Shares name with spider.

Go to article.

The Presets stream new song 'Ghosts' (music-news.com)

New Presets music,
Streaming for all their people,
A sweeping synth wash.

Go to article.

Bolivia bans Coca Cola to celebrate 'end of capitalism' (SBS)

First Maccas, now Coke,
Bolivia bans big names,
New 'culture of life'.

Go to article.

Vertigo is named "greatest film of all time" (BBC)

Citizen Kane shunned.

The Godfather is denied.

Vertigo comes top.

Go to article.

Snoop Dogg: 'I have always said I was Bob Marley reincarnated' (NME)

His third eye open,
Snoop Dogg sees the reggae light,
Snoop Lion is born!

Go to article.

Hobbit films will be a trilogy Peter Jackson confirms (BBC)

Back in the hobbit,
Jackson plans for trilogy,
Bilbo will return!

Go to article.

Australia beats Britain 74-58 in opening game of London Games basketball (Perth now)

Opals slam dunk Brits,
Opening game win for Oz,
Jackson the main gem.

Go to article.

Queen in spoof Bond film for Olympics opening ceremony (Sun)

GOSH, Sergeant Peppers,
Bean, Bond, and a flying Queen,
Olympics open!

Go to article.

Japanese women fall behind Hong Kong in longevity (BBC)

Turning Japanese,
Hong Kong ladies take the lead,
Outliving us all.

Go to article.

Pictures: Strange New Fish Found Deep off New Zealand (National Geographic)

Science drowned in strange,
Some fishy things down below,
New species revealed.

Go to article.

X Factor judge Nicole Scherzinger 'throws tantrum over economy flight' (Metro)

Why ask for first class
When pop singers music is
Economy grade?

Go to article.

Mel C: There's no Spice rift (music-news.com)

Girls to spice up games?
Headlines? (Friendship never ends),
Posh, say you'll be there!

Go to article.

First 50-eyed flatworm discovered (BBC)

New species of worm
Has fifty-fifty vision.
Eye-opening stuff.

Go to article.

PM's online foray gets mixed reviews (SBS)

Skype date with the boss?
PM reaches out online,
Viewers click dislike.

Go to article.

The Dark Knight Rises wins praise from critics (BBC)

Last chapter wins praise,
Critics fill screens with applause,
As Dark Knight departs.

Go to article.

TV habits 'can predict kids' waist size and fitness' (BBC)

Square eyes and round waists,
Kids' appetite for TV
Indicates health risks.

Go to article.

Angelina Jolie 'bans Rihanna from playlist' (music-news.com)

Mummy Ange steps in,
Riri too much the rude boy,
Raunchy lyrics banned.

Go to article.

Cat video film festival to celebrate web's furriest virals (BBC)

Cat festival planned,
Who will be the headline star?
Keyboard Cat, of course.

Go to article.

Parents charged in UAE after hidden baby found in carry-on (CNN)

X-ray screen surprise,
Over the liquids limit,
Baby found in bag!

Go to article.

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes settle divorce (ABC)

Superstar couple
Settle their risky business,
Can Dawson play now?

Go to article.

Wimbledon 2012: Jonathan Marray and Freddie Neilsen claim Wimbledon men's doubles title (Daily Record)

Marray and Neilson,
A seventy six year wait,
Brit Wimbledon win!

Go to article.

Gun brandished during live Jordanian TV debate (BBC)

Debate becomes duel,
Guest uses Wild West tactics,
To make himself heard.

Go to article.

Wimbledon 2012: Serena Williams wins fifth singles title (BBC)

Just too much power,
Wimble-done and won again,
Serena Grand Slam.

Go to article.

A Hard Day's Night by numbers (SBS)

Beatles chords unlocked,
Maths is ticket to ride by
Fourier transform.

Go to article.

Justin Bieber graduates high school (music-news.com)

Teen star graduates,
Not a girl, not yet a man,
Bieber growing up.

Go to article.

Superb Spain make history by thrashing Italy to win Euro 2012 (BBC)

A 4 - nil thumping,
Spanish outclass Italy,
Euro champions!

Go to article.

Spain beat Portugal on penalties (BBC)

Fabregas hero,
Euro sees more penalties,
Dramatic Spain win.

Go to article.

Last Pinta giant tortoise Lonesome George dies (BBC)

Lonesome George departs,
To join the rest of his kind,
Leaving Earth with none.

Go to article.

Outback drag queens create wave of acceptance (ABC)

Glitz, glamour and dust,
Time to accept a new Queen,
Priscilla is back!

Go to article.

Father of Modern Computing, Nazi Code Breaker, Homosexual (NYT)

Turing remembered
On his 100th birthday.
Genius cut short.

Go to article.

Weather Forecast New York (wunderground.com)

Tomorrows forecast,
Morning chance of storms then clear,
Breezy New York day.

Go to article.

Lady Gaga: My brain is a jellyfish (music-news.com)

With head of jelly,
Poles can't break her poker face,
She was born this way.

Go to article.

Melbourne's mini meerkats to meet the public (SMH)

Five times the cuteness,
Meerkittens make their debut,
Those kids love to pose.

Go to article.

Poor ticket sales cancel The Voice UK Live tour (BBC)

Pop not popular,
The Voice fails to strike a chord,
Tickets go begging.

Go to article.

Overweight people a threat to food security (SBS)

A weighty problem
For sustainability,
Slim chance against fat.

Go to article.

Neverseconds: Martha Payne, the unsquashable school meal crusader, aged nine (The Telegraph)

Post twitter frenzy,
Martha back on the menu,
Council ban reversed.

Go to article.

School dinner blogger banned (BBC)

School girl blogger banned,
Council deems her photos too
Unappetizing.

Go to article.

Westlife singer Shane Filan is declared bankrupt (BBC)

Not unbreakable,
Westlife property biz fails,
Who will raise him up?

Go to article.

No Doubt christen new album (music-news.com)

No doubt 'Push and Shove'
Their way back into the biz,
Comeback album named.

Go to article.

Dingo DID take baby Azaria (Daily Mail)

Decision is reached.
Thirty-year case put to rest.
The dingo did it.

Go to article.

Orang-utans Skype each other on iPad (SBS)

New tricks for old ape,
As habitats are destroyed,
Zoos get tech-savvy.

Go to article.

Controversial bioethicist tops Queen's honours (ABC)

Bioethicist,
"Most dangerous man on earth,"
Honoured by the Queen.

Go to article.

Billy Corgan promises wrestling reality show (music-news.com)

An unlikely match,
A singing pumpkin wrestles,
That's smashing TV.

Go to article.

Venus makes rare trek across Sun (BBC)

Show for sky-watchers,
Venus treks across the sun,
A rare spectacle.

Go to article.

Thousands without power in stormy Sydney (SBS)

Wild weather lashes,
Thousands are left powerless,
Sydney storms hit hard.

Go to article.

Desperate Housewives actress dies (BBC)

Housewife sadly dies,
Nosy neighbour is no more,
Farewell McCluskey.

Go to article.

Concerns schools failing to recognise deadly allergies (ABC)

Satay takes teen boy,
Parents urge schools understand,
Allergies can kill!

Go to article.

Diamond Jubilee: Queen starts celebrations at the Derby (BBC)

Gun salutes echo,
Queen crosses the Derby line,
Jubilee kicks off!

Go to article.

Let's hope Joanna is wrong or we're never getting out of here (Belfast Telegraph)

No fear for Lumley,
For when this Ab Fab life ends,
She'll reincarnate!

Go to article.

Gay superheroes under fire from US pressure group (Guardian)

Villainous moms say
Heroes must stay in closet.
Marvel makes a stand.

Go to article.

Miami's "growling cannibal" named (BBC)

Miami Nightmare.
Zombie killer stalks the streets,
Eating folk alive.

Go to article.

Cockatoo jail birds escape Sydney's Taronga Zoo (ABC)

Zoo cocks on the fly,
Afraid of the sea eagles,
Captive birds escape.

Go to article.

Marvel X-Man has comics' first gay wedding (Guardian)

Marvel cast gathers,
For landmark celebration,
As gay hero weds.

Go to article.

Eurovision Song Contest won by Sweden's Loreen (BBC)

A new Euro queen,
With Swedish Euphoria,
The Hump left behind.

Go to article.

Austria's Michael Haneke takes home second Palme d'Or (CNN)

A film about love,
And octogenarians,
Wins Cannes' craved Palme d'Or.

Go to article.

Aussie Buchanan wins first BMX world title (SBS)

BMX bandit,
Buchanan wins world title,
Racing to London.

Go to article.

Kylie Minogue movie 'tipped to win Cannes' (BBC)

Festival folk just
Can't get her out of their heads.
Kylie's film's a hit!

Go to article.

Top 10 list of new species (SMH)

A sneezing monkey,
A SpongeBob SquarePants mushroom,
Top 10 newbies named!

Go to article.

Skydiver jumps without chute (BBC)

Proof that man can fly,
Skydiver takes leap of faith,
And glides to safety.

Go to article.

Bus passenger who stabbed, beheaded and ate parts of fellow traveller 'thought he was attacking an alien' (London Evening Standard)

A Schizophrenic,
Who killed and ate 'alien',
Now shows some remorse.

Go to article.

Hippo Birdy Hai-news!

Champagne is flowing,
Hai-news celebrates 1 year,
More haikus to come!

View blog.

Robin Gibb: Music stars pay tribute to Bee Gees singer (BBC)

Music Tragedy,
More than simply Night Fever,
Cancer kills Bee Gee.

Go to article.

Mark Zuckerberg weds long-time girlfriend (ABC)

A Facebook event,
The boss presents his new wife
With status update.

Go to article.

Jackie Chan announces "last action role" (BBC)

The Karate Kid,
Hangs up his Fists Of Fury,
With last action role.

Go to article.

Disco queen Donna Summer dies at 63 (CNN)

She sang, "I Feel Love,"
And everyone danced along.
Goodbye, Disco Queen.

Go to article.

Thieves take £11,000 of sex toys (BBC)

Thieves show their lewd side,
As rampant rabbits vanish,
In erotic theft.

Go to article.

Lady Gaga Indonesia concert denied permit by police (BBC)

Pop concert scandal,
A Jakarta Bad Romance,
'Vulgar' Gaga hushed.

Go to article.

Happy Birthday, A Clockwork Orange (Guardian)

A Clockwork Orange
Celebrates fifty years of
Notoriety.

Go to article.

Heatwaves, bushfires predicted to hammer NSW (ABC)

Oz to feel the heat,
Carbon fuelled flames will burn a
frightful inferno!

Go to article.

Orbit Tower unveiled at London's Olympic Park (CNN)

London's new eyesore,
Sculpture hopes to rival Eye,
The Orbit erect.

Go to article.

Prince Charles presents weather (BBC)

"The forecast is bright,
I hope your week's a delight,
I'm Prince Charles, good night."

Go to article.

New bra has ice, wind chimes (SBS)

Ice, wind, & mint bra,
Japanese innovation,
Cool girls show their cups.

Go to article.

Clinton Cards goes into administration (BBC)

Hi Mister Clinton,
Do you have a card that says
"Sorry you've gone bust"?

Go to article.

Russian jet with 44 aboard missing in Indonesia (ABC)

Hey you, hey you there,
Have you seen my Russian jet?
Yeah, I've lost it, mate.

Go to article.

Wild Things author Maurice Sendak dies at 83 (BBC)

The wise old author,
Who knew where the wild things are,
Dies aged eighty-three.

Go to article.

Short Black: Former boy-band star Dobson to open Guerilla in our midst (SMH)

5ive slam dunk Sydney,
If ya gettin' down, baby,
Go dine underground.

Go to article.

Peru issues public health alert over pelican and dolphin deaths (Guardian)

Pelicans found dead.
Dolphins wash up on the shore.
Beach becomes graveyard.

Go to article.

David Attenborough's 60-year career celebrated in BBC series (Guardian)

Wildlife legend shines,
As his sixty-year career,
Is praised in new show.

Go to article.

James Blunt killed off in internet hoax (music-news.com)

You can see his face
Alive in a crowded place,
Blunt death just a hoax.

Go to article.

Alex Ferguson refuses to give up on title after United defeat Swansea 2-0 (Metro)

A United win,
Title race not over yet,
Climax approaches.

Go to article.

Bigger and brighter "super moon" graces the night sky (BBC)

What's that in the sky?
Is it a bird or a plane?
No, it's Super Moon!

Go to article.

Bodies hung from bridge as 23 more die in Mexico drug war (Guardian)

Mexico drug war,
Bodies found hanging from bridge,
Decapitated.

Go to article.

Beastie Boys star Adam Yauch dies aged 47 (BBC)

The Beastie Boy who
Fought for our right to party,
Loses fight for life.

Go to article.

Iconic artwork "The Scream" sold for $120m (BBC)

A screaming success.
Art icon sells for millions.
A new record's set.

Go to article.

US releases bin Laden documents (ABC)

One year without him,
Bin Laden letters released,
Was all as it seemed?

Go to article.

Marvel Avengers Assemble tops UK box office chart (BBC)

Triumph for Marvel,
As thousands crowd cinemas.
Heroes gain applause.

Go to article.

David Beckham Turns 37 Today (Huffington Post)

Now celebrity,
Becks celebrated right foot
Turns 37.

Go to article.

Blanchett voices character on Family Guy (SMH)

Cate back on TV
As Stewie's evil girlfriend,
New family girl.

Go to article.

A brighter day for most (BBC)

Rain and wind subside,
Sunshine finally breaks through,
Spring, at last, is here.

Go to article.

Farmer refuses to sell rude-shaped plant (Metro)

Farmer shocked to find
His veg is "pleased to see him."
Kinky good-luck charm.

Go to article.

Former LPO conductor suffers stage fall in Paris (BBC)

Strings and brass are hushed,
In a bizarre crescendo,
As conductor slips.

Go to article.

Regina Spektor unveils new song 'Small Town Moon' (NME)

On the radio,
New song, album, gigs to come;
Spektor's 'Small Town Moon'.

Go to article.

For sale: 60 of Britain's iconic red phone boxes (yahoo)

Red phone box for sale,
BT sells British icons,
Make your own Tardis!

Go to article.

KFC must pay $8.3m to poisoned girl in Australia (BBC)

Dodgy chicken wrap,
Leads to million-pound lawsuit,
The Colonel ain't pleased.

Go to article.

Muppets to return in film sequel (BBC)

The Muppets are back!
But without Jason Segal.
Kermit's on his own.

Go to article.

US man's fossil find stumps experts (SBS)

'Godzillus' fossil,
Uncovered in the US,
What on earth is it?

Go to article.

In pictures: Cutty Sark ship-shape once more (BBC)

Ship gutted by flames,
The Cutty Sark in Greenwich,
Finally restored.

Go to article.

Jacksons want a hologram version of Michael for tour (music-news.com

I'm starting with the
Hologram in the mirror,
A Jackson thriller.

Go to article.

The King's Speech play to close in West End (BBC)

The king falls silent,
Film's success unmatched by stage,
Speech abruptly ends.

Go to article.

Chicken without an egg born in Sri Lanka (Metro)

Chicken or the egg?
In Sri Lanka not the egg,
But chicken comes first.

Go to article.

Gotye tops US music chart (ABC)

Aussie tops Billboard,
A first since Savage Garden,
Gotye on top.

Go to article.

Gulf seafood deformities alarm scientists (Aljazeera)

Oil still devastates,
Blind shrimp are catch of the day,
Thanks a lot BP.

Go to article.

"I found 11 films showing my wife in indecent scenes with her lover": Egyptian man's shock as wife pops up in porn film online (Mirror)

Porn-virgin husband,
Surfs the web for dirty films,
Finds his dirty wife.

Go to article.

Jack White streams debut solo album 'Blunderbuss' online (NME)

Jack White's 'Blunderbuss',
From The White Stripes to Itunes,
Solo debut streams.

Go to article.

Tube workers vote to strike over pay row (BBC)

Hello passengers,
There will be major delays
Until they pay us.

Go to article.

Jessie J 'Being Monitored By Doctors' Amidst Health Fears (mtv.co.uk)

Nobody's perfect,
It's not about the money,
But Jessie J's health.

Go to article.

Auroras Seen on Uranus For First Time (National Geographic)

In a stroke of luck
Hubble snaps auroral storms,
Uranus lights up.

Go to article.

Titanic 3D crowns UK box office chart (BBC)

UK number 1,
Titanic is flying, Jack!
Her heart will go on.

Go to article.

Chisel fans left cold after cat bites Moss (ABC)

Rock star cat attack,
Moss 'sorry to be pussy',
Chisel fans left cold.

Go to article.

Half a million Mac computers infected with malware (BBC)

Macs hacked by virus,
Is yours a rotten apple?
Thousands are at risk.

Go to article.

Tourists return to post-war Bosnia (SBS)

Food, wine, and culture,
Tourists back in Bosnia,
A long slow return.

Go to article.

Dannii Minogue, Kris Smith split (ABC)

Announced on twitter,
Please don't judge the Ex-factor,
Dannii and Kris split.

Go to article.

Prince Harry hailed a hero after rescuing injured polo player (Metro)

Prince to the rescue!
Harry 'doing the right thing,'
Saves polo player.

Go to article.

10 stories that could be April Fools pranks but aren't (BBC)

PM pasta sauce,
Lion victim saved by bear,
No donkey parade.

Go to article.

Aung San Suu Kyi wins seat in parliament (ABC)

Aung San Suu Kyi wins
First bid for parliament seat,
Thousands celebrate.

Go to article.

Pesticides hit queen bee numbers (BBC)

Numbers in decline,
Impacts beyond colony,
Pesticides kill bees!

Go to article.

Britney Spears 'wants end to conservatorship' (music-news.com)

Overprotected,
When she tried to fly she fell,
Spears says 'Gimme more'.

Go to article.

Apple offers iPad refunds in Australia over 4G (BBC)

4G advertised,
Apple Ipad in trouble,
Customers misled.

Go to article.

Jet announce break-up after 11 years (Digital Spy)

Rollover DJ,
Please don't play Jet anymore,
Those cold hard bitches.

Go to article.

Hunger Games sets US box office record (BBC)

A box office smash,
Odds in Hunger Games favour,
Action film well fed.

Go to article.

Sydney pips Jets for finals spot (TheWorldGame)

For Sydney FC,
Win against Newcastle Jets,
Captures finals berth.

Go to article.

Stevie Wonder to headline Bestival festival on Isle of Wight (BBC)

I just called to say...
Signed, sealed, delivered, he's ours.
Bestival Wonder!

Go to article.

Michael Phelps sad no rematch but Thorpe 'not the same' (USA Today)

Fish out of water?
Legends showdown not to be,
The Thorpedo sinks.

Go to article.

John Carter Flop To Cost Disney $200m (BBC)

Million dollar loss,
As Disney's new hero bombs,
Kids don't like Carter.

Go to article

Torture By Music (BBC)

To break a mans mind,
Art for joy used to degrade,
Mix tape of torture.

Go to article.

Barry Humphries retires as Dame Edna and Sir Les (perth now)

Last Humphries live shows,
Fond farewell for an icon,
Time to move on, Dame.

Go to article.

Attenborough stage show headed to Australia (ABC)

History on stage,
Sir David heads down under,
A legend talks life.

Go to article.

Bear Grylls Sacked By Discovery Channel (BBC)

Wild man gets the axe,
No more daring adventures,
Goodbye Mr Bear.

Go to article.

Belgium in mourning after 28 die in Swiss coach crash (BBC)

Switzerland coach crash,
Belgium mourns 28 deaths,
Ski trip tragedy.

Go to article.

Nose for Arctic oil makes Shell's ears prick up (SMH)

Shell explores new means,
Beneath arctic snow and ice,
Sniffer dogs sniff oil.

Go to article.

Kazakhstan national anthem replaced by Ricky Martin song (mirror)

Pride of Kazakhstan,
Livin' la Vida Loca,
An anthem blunder.

Go to article.

World's first cupcake ATM (SBS)

CAKES CAKES CUPCAKES CAKES!
Vending ALL DAY from machine!
Keeps Bridie happy!

Go to article.

Sydney Tattoo Parlour Hit By Bullets (7news)

No ink in this gun,
Sydney shootings on the rise,
Tattoo parlours hit.

Go to article.

I turned down Eurovision: Donovan (SMH)

To dodge 'microscope',
Neighbours-has-been Donovan
Snubbed Eurovision.

Go to article.

Condoms mandatory for porn actors (msn)

More safe sex on set,
Rubbery days for porn stars,
Enforced protection.

Go to article.

Rihanna 'Brown track wasn't shock tactic' (music-news.com)

Riri runs from Brown,
S.O.S someone help her,
Love found in London?

Go to article.

Riverina residents to spend night in emergency accomodation (ABC)

Days of heavy rain,
Hundreds evacuated,
Riverina floods.

Go to article.

Engelbert Humperdinck is UK Eurovision act for 2012 (BBC)

In Azerbaijan,
'King of Romance' Humperdink,
Sings Eurovision.

Go to article.

Funniest exam answers become internet sensation (Telegraph)

Funny online craze,
'Giraffes are heartless creatures',
Pupils the punchline.

Go to article.

Rain stops playing: Playground Weekender festival cancelled (SMH)

Playground weekender,
Torrential rain predicted,
Festival washed out.

Go to article.

Big NZ fossil penguin reconstructed (BBC)

From fossil remains,
Extinct bird reconstructed,
New Zealand penguin.

Go to article.

Party time in Brazil as Carnival gets under way (SBS)

Glittering parades,
Unabashed merry-making,
Party in Rio!

Go to article.

Shakira tweets about sea lion attack in Cape Town (The Telegraph)

Shakira makes claim,
Sea lion attacks 'She Wolf',
And her hips don't lie.

Go to article.

Bus driver charged with filming passengers (ABC)

Cameras in bus floor,
Passengers filmed from below,
Sydney driver charged.

Go to article.

Man jailed for chainsaw attack in a Hull public house (BBC)

Man jailed for 3 years,
Hull pub chainsaw massacre,
Tekken addiction?

Go to article.

Whitney Houston, dead at 48, will be remembered at Grammy’s (sun-times)

Unknown cause of death,
Houston we have a problem,
We'll always love you.

Go to article.

Space skydiver seeks record (SBS)

Aussie seeks record,
Skydiver to fall from space,
Jump fraught with danger.

Go to article.

Lana Del Rey conquers UK album chart (BBC)

Lana plays no games,
Del Ray debuts number 1,
Born to dominate.

Go to article.

Bee Gees' Robin Gibb 'feels fantastic' after cancer recovery (NME)

Feeling fantastic,
Robin Gibb stayin' alive,
Avoids tragedy.

Go to article.

Newsmaker: Louie the Fly (SMH)

Mortein swats its staff,
Louie and 200 jobs
Move offshore from Oz.

Go to article.

First Plants Caused Ice Ages, New Research Reveals (Science Daily)

As first plants emerged,
Atmosphere lost CO2,
Temperatures tumbled.

Go to article.

Facebook to go public in billion-dollar IPO (ABC)

From college dorm room
Society was transformed,
Now purchase your share.

Go to article.

Disabled NSW kids to get their buses soon (SBS)

Disabled stranded,
Contractors offered more pay,
Kids to ride again!

Go to article.

ABBA album preview (music-news.com)

New ABBA release,
First since 1994,
Here we go again.

Go to article.

Djokovic wins epic final (ABC)

Tennis history,
In longest ever final,

Djokovic victor.

Go to article.

Victoria Azarenka hails 'dream' Australian Open triumph (BBC)

Grand slam down under,
Azarenka wins open,
New world number 1.

Go to article.

Bill Gates: I don't pay enough tax (BBC)

Richest man on earth,
Refuses to pay taxes,
What a massive twat!

Author: Fred Palmer
Go to article.

Solar storms trigger stunning displays of Northern Lights (Birmingham Mail)

Intense solar storms,
Magic aurora display,
Rare sight for UK.

Go to article.

Heidi Klum, Seal confirm split (ABC)

After three children,
And seven years of marriage,
Seal and Klum part ways.

Go to article.

Brazil police storm landless settlement near Sao Paulo (BBC)

Riot police storm,
Operation eviction,
Settlement reclaimed.

Go to article.

Can oldies Beckham and Giggs really be golden at the Olympics? (Sports review)

The 'golden oldies',
Veterans may reunite
For Olympic dream.

Go to article.

Meryl Streep Devastated She Swore On Stage At Golden Globes (entertainmentwise)

At the Golden Globes
Meryl 'Iron Lady' Streep
Swears in trophy win.

Go to article.

Australian researchers name rare horsefly after Beyonce (Metro)

Fun taxonomy,
Fly's 'Goldmember' derrière
receives pop-star name.

Go to article.

US warns of Bangkok terrorist threat (SMH)

US tracks suspects,
Tourists warned in Thai kingdom,
Terror threat looming.

Go to article.

Web addicts have brain changes, research suggests (BBC)

Addictive web-use,
Disrupted brain connections,
Like drugs or drinking.

Go to article.

Russian baby disappears in sewer (ABC)

Pavement collapses,
Woman and stroller rescued,
No baby in sight.

Go to article.

Rihanna Confirms Beyonce's Baby Girl's Birth via Twitter (ibtimes)

With Jay-Z's blueprint
Blue Ivy Carter arrives,
Lookin' so crazy!

Go to article.

Seabird hunting ban proposed by Icelandic scientists (Icenews)

Complete protection
Seen as only way to save
Five species at risk.

Go to article.

Advantage Australia as Clarke's triple ton puts hosts in box seat (SMH)

A cricket legend,
Declares short of great record,
A true team-player.

Go to article.

Bloc Party demo new album in New York (music-news.com)

Back from hiatus,
Bloc Party in the US
Begin fourth album.

Go to article.

New Year's Eve 2012: Celebrations around the world (BBC)

World celebrations,
Fireworks ring in new year,
All parties and smiles.

Go to article.